Oh, hi, feel at ease. Grab a cup of tea and settle down. We also have some cookies!
What are you doing here? Well, does not matter in the end, but I hope you're enjoying the place. Ah, you must be wondering who I am. Well, I'm a girl looking for a purpose in life and trying to be happy as much as possible. Cliché, isn't it? But it's true, sorry to disappoint you.
Oh yeah, I will not bother you anymore. Enjoy your stay!